If you’re finding yourself procrastinating on bar prep, I’m here to tell you there’s a good reason why—and it’s probably not what you think.
You might think that if you’re putting off your bar studies, it’s because you’re lazy, unprepared, or don’t have enough time. But that’s not the case. Many of my clients come to me, stressed out and worried about their procrastination, and it's almost never about laziness or lack of resources.
So, what’s the real culprit? It’s something sneakier, something that affects every area of your life: Perfectionism.
Perfectionism: The Hidden Barrier
Perfectionism has a way of creeping in and sabotaging your efforts, even when you have everything you need to succeed. Perfectionists need to feel in control to feel safe. But here’s the kicker—bar prep is inherently unpredictable. You could study your heart out, know the material backwards and forwards, and still fall short because of factors beyond your control, like the scaling of scores.
This lack of guaranteed outcomes is a nightmare for perfectionists. The fear of doing everything right and still failing can be paralyzing, leading to a “why even try?” mentality.
The Double-Edged Sword of Perfectionism
Perfectionism doesn’t just stop you from starting; it also can turn you into a machine, driving you to study every available minute, forsaking any semblance of a balanced life. You push yourself to the brink, and then, when you do take a break, the guilt sets in. You beat yourself up for any moment not spent studying, for every nap, every walk, every bit of self-care.
This negative self-talk is perfectionism undercover. It’s meant to save you from the later self-flagellation that comes if you don’t pass the bar. You tell yourself that taking any break is why you didn’t do well, setting yourself up for a no-win situation. It’s a vicious cycle.
The Consequences of Perfectionism
If you’re a perfectionist, you hold yourself to incredibly high standards and are your harshest critic. This all stems from a need for safety.
Ask yourself: what about the bar exam and the possibility of failing feels threatening to you? Does failing mean you’ll be rejected by peers or lose your job? For many, the stakes feel that high.
Perfectionists often believe they can’t live life fully until they pass the bar. This mindset makes the idea of failing unbearable, creating immense pressure that fuels procrastination.
Changing the Narrative
It’s crucial to reassess the significance you attach to passing or failing the bar exam. Can you scale it back to a more realistic level? Can you treat yourself with compassion, both leading up to and after the exam?
Allow yourself to feel your feelings without self-condemnation. Understand that taking care of your mental and physical health is not a weakness but a necessity.
This self-punishment makes failing sting so much more. By recognizing and dismantling your perfectionism, you can remove the hot stinging whip of self-flagellation. This isn’t something that will magically disappear once you pass the bar; it’s a mindset that will follow you into your legal career unless you address it now.
Ready to Break Free?
Don’t let perfectionism hold you back
If you’re ready to stop beating yourself up and start dismantling perfectionism, it’s time for us to talk. Click here for a quick 15-minute chat.
We’ll explore what you’re going through, what needs to be done, and see if there are opportunities and resources that can help you dive deeper into your mindset and conquer your challenges.