It seems like everything is smooth sailing until you decide to do something different, something daring. Then sh#t hits the fan. I won't lie to you, it happens to me too.
GOLDMINE success mindset topics are discussed every Thursday evening inside the Bar Exam support group.
After 1.5 years in business, I'm proud of where Bar Exam Mentor and my 180° Life Coaching programs are, the people we've helped, and the lives we've changed. But my feelings didn't match the success.
A friend suggested, "You need to celebrate". It wasn't my first time hearing it. I knew I needed to do it, but I wasn't.
Why?
Conditioning. (Pattern of thought we previously adopted that dictates our current behavior, usually on autopilot)
I decided to undo that conditioning by doing the very thing I had avoided, celebrating. I had the perfect opportunity. My birthday was coming up.
The key in breaking conditioning is observing oneself as you engage in the dreaded act.
By observing emotions and mind-chatter while acting on the goal, you can understand that tangled web of beliefs and emotions behind the conditioning.
I planned festivities for my birthday. Then Hurricane Dorian was forecasted to rain on my parade. I woke up two days before my birthday amidst feelings of shame and guilt for asking people to travel, spend money, and think about me when a life-threatening storm was on the way. "Maybe I should cancel."
And I caught it. Resistance! It meant I was on the right track. You see when events crop up and your emotions rise to follow, you are facing classic resistance against your attempt to break an unhelpful pattern.
I knew what must be done. Persist.
As I relayed this story to my son he asked "but what if the thing that's happening is out of your control?" I explained that is exactly how resistance is meant to look. It's the ULTIMATE temptation to cancel your goals or even say it's some message from the Universe that you're wrong and must stop. This is when you must KEEP GOING.
So I kept my birthday plans. Wouldn't you know it, the storm stayed away.
This was my first go at celebrating for real, for real. The self-centered, self-loving, all about me, I-can-do-what-I-want-cause-it's-my-birthday kind of celebrating. And it felt GOOD!
Now that conditioning is broken and I can revel in my accomplishments big and small and solidify the feeling of success.
Where are you dissatisfied in life? What do you need to break the conditioning on?
Do you want some help pinpointing what's in the way?
If you're having trouble passing the Bar or achieving a more satisfying life, conditioning and resistance is the Universal culprit.
Let's talk and see how helping you would look like. Use this link to schedule a call